Reviewer: famaggiolo Signed
08 Aug 2010
Chapter 36: Chapter 36
Wow, Michele the response this week is amazing. Since everyone is having a little trouble dealing this the jealous issue I thought I would write a review and if people want to read it and get a better understand how BDSM works.
I am "JustJinger or Peoplelikeus" beta and I agree with your comment that Bella should have some balls but to beta this story and to keep it as close to real life I had to buy books on BDSM and I can tell you now I would make a really crappy sub!
There is not room what so ever for JEALOUSY in BDSM. As a submissive you have to trust your Dom and I am sorry to say what your Dom says goes. Hence the reason for safe words. If Bella was uncomfortable with what Edward was doing to her she should have said Yellow and talked to him or Red and they would have left the party. But once again Bella's pride got in the way and she said nothing and stewed the night away.
As for what happened with Vanessa, if she was not happy, felt humiliated, or did not want to do it. Once again she has her safe words. She chose not to use it. She is the only one in charge of how she feels and she is the only one that can use them. Think of it like this, can you tell what your cat is feeling when it meow's at you, can you read its mind, no you cant. Same with Edward, he has these word there for a reason, to let him know what she if feeling at all times. He cant make her use them, also he keeps asking her what colour and she keeps saying green. So he keep going on with his plan.
Now I am in no way saying Bella is at fault. I am not. Edward should have prepared her a little better by sitting her down and forcing her to ask questions about the play party, but once again he asked if she had questions, you can take a horse to water but you cant make questions it drink. So if Bella let the opportunity go, who is to blame.
What these two are going through now is a learning curve, Bella has never been a sub before and Edward should have know better. Bella has a way of not getting the information she needs or say "fine" all the time. Instead of just leaving it to her to ask questions. Edward should have sat down with her and had a proper conversation. Be then you have to keep in mind he has never collared before, so he has never had to teach anyone. They girls he has always had have been trained and collared many times before.
To be a true submissive when playing is to truly let go of all that you believe. You have no control what so ever apart from feeling. This is the point of the Dominant he controls you. He controls your body to give you pleasure, pain, satisfaction, wants, needs, desire, greed, and so many more feeling. The only thing you mainly control is how you feel physically and mentally about this. Is it to much or to little. I think the best way of describing it is you are Goldilocks inside the 3 bears house.
Edward is already to lenient on Bella, she gets away with so much, the yelling, the disobedience, the punishments, it should be at least 10 to 20 strokes per infringement, Edward is lucky to give her 10 sometimes. If she was with a Dominant that did not do this her backside would be red not pink. For example what she pulled in the playroom after Edward did not call for the week, where she had lost the weight etc, she had at least broken 4 or more rules that should have been at least 40 strokes and I totally understand why, but this is just an example of how Edward is being lenient on Bella.
This is one thing that Michele and I argue about all the time, but at the end of the day it is her story and I am just here to guide her along. But then again there is also a reason for this in her mind. I am sure she will tell me soon...
When I was editing this chapter for Michele, I know I had some of the same feeling and reactions, why this and that, and I had to really go back and read the books and make sure we got is right and I think we came really close.
As for Bella "growing a pair" when she is collared she cant, she has her rules to follow and the big on is to be respectful at all times, so she can tell him what she feels but she had to take the emotion out of it, she cant yell at him, she cant swear at all, all things you would do if you saw your boyfriend kissing someone else, you just cant do this. This is where it is hard in these controlling, submissive relationships. You have to separate your Dom/sub relationship from your boyfriend/girlfriend relationship. It is like anger should not to be brought into the playroom, either the Dom or sub could get hurt. This is the same, emotions like these have to be left at the door or you do not play.
So I hope this helps while you read the rest of the story, if not jump on a few web sites out there, there are some really good ones where you can learn and be informed about this lifestyle. It really is an interesting way to live, the discipline a person needs, is amazing.
Thank you for reading Michele's story and taking the time to review. I hope this has helped a little. If you have any questions I would try and answer them for you. I am not into or do not practice BDSM but I have read a lot on the subject for Michele.
And this ladies and gentlemen, is why I love this woman - she makes sense of my madness and endless ramblings. thanks fee